Modern Day Enemies

Love your enemies. How hard that is! I don’t even have enemies, yet, it’s still very difficult. I cannot image how hard this must be with actual enemies. I guess my modern day enemies are people that I simply find very difficult to get along with, people that I don’t actually want to spend any time with.

However, is not that I don’t love them, because I do. I care about them, I wish they could be happy and let me be happy. I wish them joy, health and actual happiness. I love them as I love human begins. But I don’t particularly like them…well, that’s probably a lie. I guess I like them somehow. Can I like them from far away?

But loving like Jesus does is so difficult! I think I’m trying, yet I know I could do a better job. So I pray about it, but it doesn’t feel honest. I’m not even sure what I’m praying for. So I asked: what should I pray for? None of these feels honest.

The answer is that I must pray to find the good in them. Seems simple and achievable, in fact I know many of their qualities. They have very good things! But I’m mean, and I focus on the bad (to justify my dis-likening) , so I pray to do the opposite. And this just goes on and on. There are weeks when I think I’m doing a good job, but other days, it feels that I’m not moving forward at all.

Now that I’ve established what are modern day enemies (my own random definition that I came up with in about 30 seconds), I suddenly felt that I wanted to complain and say that back in Mexico, I never had these kind of enemies. That all these weirdness is a Canadian thing.

I really want to believe that! I would love to blame Canada for these people I cannot get along with. But that’s not true, I also had modern day enemies in Mexico.  I disliked certain people so much. Back then I was not a good Catholic, so I didn’t even pray for them, I didn’t care about finding or focusing on their qualities. Honestly, that was easier (but remember, being Catholic is not easy at all!). I didn’t like them, and I could list lots of reasons for this. This attitude only led me to dislike them more, and overall to more anger.

When I pray for my modern day enemies I’m not glowing with joy, and sometimes it feels like I’m going nowhere. But I know it is the right thing to do. It’s not easy to grow in holiness, but I’m trying and I am blessed to have all the tools to succeed at it. It doesn’t matter how long it takes, I’ll keep on trying.

Pray for me, so that I may find it easier and easier to focus on the good things of my modern day enemies.

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About silviaeningles

I’m Silvia and these are some interesting things about me: I was born in Puebla, a beautiful city in central Mexico. It is an old city, founded in 1531 I live in Vancouver, British Columbia in Canada I have a blog in Spanish that you’re welcome to read (http://comenzandolashistorias.blogspot.ca/) I love hummingbirds, tea and Mexican candy I really enjoy when readers write and comment on my posts I love writing, and I really enjoy poetry (reading aloud my favourite poems always makes me happy)
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